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Lady Captain Julie's Update

Dear Ladies

I know in the great scheme of things it’s not important and I know I shouldn’t think it, but I shouldn’t be here! Instead, I should be lying under a palm tree, in St Lucia, in my kaftan, with a Pina Colada in both hands. To give Poor Henry a break from the dizzy whirl of living with me, I had booked a holiday in St Lucia with my sister- the one who, if you remember from earlier ramblings, talks like an encyclopaedia and spends her time travelling the globe sheltering people after earthquakes and mud slides. She has gone on, cos she’s brave, but I didn’t think that the Bright Copper Kettles could do without my 11 points in the Winter League and also poor Henry, who if you remember from earlier ramblings, can’t cook, won’t cook, and doesn’t do the garden either, might starve to death without me.

Thank you to all those ladies, and some gents, who on Tuesday, supported our inaugural putting competition in aid of Cancer Focus, a local charity which has had its fundraising income decimated by the effects of Covid 19. Twelve ladies took part- all admirable putters- and I am delighted to declare that our first competitor of the day, Claire White, was the winner. She will find a brown paper package tied up with string waiting for her in the Locker Room. Lady President Eileen and I enjoyed our foundering so much that we have decided to repeat the competition every fortnight and organise a little league with glittering prizes at the Grand Finale. Unless they really want to, those who have already generously donated do not need to do so again. The next round will be on Tuesday 27th October from 12.30-1.30. We were so pleased that some ladies turned up just for the putting. Many others, and several gents, gave donations, but were too cold, after playing nine holes to actually putt! The highlight of the day was the appearance of little Nessa, only five weeks old, who turned up with her mum, Roisin Shanks. Roisin claims to know the Sound of Music better than Julie Andrews. And me. And Anne Knox. We’ll have to make sure she comes on the bus trip next year!!!

My aim for the putting competition was the same as every one of my plans for my Lady Captain’s year. I wanted a reason for ladies to come to the Club for a bite to eat, some devil’s buttermilk and a bit of craic. Once again my timing is dreadful as we enter a second lock down! Thanks Coronavirus! However, we will continue! As Bunker 43 is now closed, please do come along on Tuesday’s. The coffee machine in the Pro shop serves lovely coffee, and why not treat yourself to a bag of jelly babies? Don’t forget to sanitise your hands, wear a mask (and your cosiest jumper), and remember social distancing at all times! It’s all about keeping in touch and keeping each others’ spirits up!

Last Thursday, having been invited by friends, I took my bright copper kettle, with the wonky spout and wobbly handle, to Royal Portrush. Well I don’t know what our Rory found so difficult about it, but the first hole is so easy. I beat him by three and scored two points- more than I’ve had at the first hole in Lurgan for ages! I also parred Calamity Corner and finished the round with the same ball I started with. What a load of wimps those professional are! I could (almost) hear the crowds cheering as I walked up the eighteenth fairway. Poor Henry was so impressed that he has now decided he would like to go to Peter for some lessons too. Poor Peter!!

Did any of you see the interview between Poor Peter and Annabelle Wilson on Facebook last week? Poor Peter took it upon himself to rummage about in Annabel’s bag. What man would even dream of looking in lady’s bag- golf bag or otherwise! I dare him to rummage about in mine!!!!!

Happy golfing

Lady Captain Julie

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